Touchdown Breakdown (or, How to Win in the New NFL).

A thorough and scientific dissection of the now infamous Touchception. Intended for instructional purposes only. Adapted from Monday Night Football September 24, 2012, Seattle WA.

1. Go ahead and start with a pass interference penalty to get that pesky defender out of your way. It's cool; no one's watching.

---

2. Do the Hokey-Pokey (you put your right arm out)

---

3. If you still can't catch the ball, at least catch the guy who did catch the ball.

---

4. Ask a teammate to tug the facemask of the guy who caught the ball. This will cause neck strain, and may possibly result in him releasing the ball.

---

5. DON'T SKIP THIS IMPORTANT STEP! Before you start, make sure that the referees are locked out, and that these are just replacement guys.

---

6. T-O-U-C-H-D-O-W-N!!!!!! Celebrate what you have accomplished!